Getting real with yourself

It’s only within the most recent times and being in my late twenties that we only really begin to realize who we are, and what we are. We become to realize it’s living in the moment and understanding that it’s the little things that make our lives a little more happy, a little more carefree and a little less stressful.

But why is this?

Most probably because we start to settle and understand who we are, what we like, and begin to develop and understand this rollercoaster thing that is called life.

Most will have loved, most will have been heartbroken, some are yet to be heartbroken, many have lost jobs, perhaps lost money, become more financially greater off, or perhaps come out of financial difficulty and it is only in these times and through these hardships that we come true to ourselves and place ourselves not only first but become real with ourselves and yourself.

But again why is this?

Most commonly it’s because through these hardships you not only understand that you will not only stand for second best, but you soon begin to realize your actual worth, not in an arrogant way or not knowing how to compromise, but knowing where the line begins and where the line ends. You actually begin to know your worth.

It’s only through these hardships that you realise that it’s the little things that mean the most, you become less materialistic, you worry a little less, and focus your energies on other things, moments, times, and understanding that you may never get it back again.

On a personal experience, I’ve now lived away from home for coming up 6 months I decided that back in March I would up stick and leave South Shields and move literally East Coast to West Coast. Why did I do it? Because of many reasons, life is too short to sit and wander the what if’s and the could haves, it’s only when we perform outside our comfort zone that we truly know what is going to happen, and so far so good it seems to have worked. Many highs but also many low’s.

Living by myself hasn’t been the easiest of tasks as it’s basically a kind of fresh start but through work and the wonderful staff I work with you soon begin to feel grounded, and plus it gives you a sense of knowing how much home means more when you do go back now and then.

Which leads me onto being yourself, through being by yourself then and only then do you truly start to think and realise what you actually like, you become you, and begin to do the things that make well make you happy; because there’s only you to please. It’s a learning curve into realising who you truly are, learning to what you do on your days off when by yourself, learning to prep things or events to go to when you live by yourself, learning to make do with your time and understanding that not all things will happen the way you want it to.

For me it’s through these experiences that I’ve found me again, I found my love for music again from years ago, I find myself listening and learning to find new music, new artists and new genres to listen to, I read a lot more and encourage myself to place and prep for events I would not normally go to, even branching out to now passing the basic in snowboarding.

So my advice to you is this, get lonely sometimes, take time for yourself, don’t worry as to much as of the pleasing of others because home is literally you, and you are your homes first place. Until you get to know you and get real with yourself then and only then will you start to truly be happy.

James Hatton Bsc.